Motivational Speaking Services

Frequently Asked Questions

   Why is Coaching Necessary?

     What is Personal Coaching?

     Do I need a Personal Coach?

     What Types of Coaching Do You Offer?

      Is Coaching Right For You?

     Is Coaching Worth The Cost?

 

 

Motivational Speaking Services

 

CJ Scarlet is a seasoned public speaker and has presented at national and international events.  Whether conducting seminars, workshops, keynote speeches or weekend bootcamps, CJ will motivate and delight your audience with wisdom and humor.

 

To contact CJ Scarlet for additional information or to request her services, please send an email to info@cjscarlet.com or call (800) 611-3161.

 

Download your copy of CJ's Journey Presentation HERE. (Right click to "save target as")

 

 

It is said that each of us is fighting a heroic battle. My name is CJ Scarlet and this is my story. Since 1990, I have lived with Lupus and Scleroderma, both autoimmune diseases that left me with constant pain and debility. When I was told in 2002 that my disability had progressed into a life-threatening heart condition, life as I knew it ended with a sickening thud. My family quickly dove into denial, leaving me with no one to talk to about my fears. I was terrified!—of pain, of debility, of dying—and yet there was no one I could turn to for comfort and wisdom.

I spent the first year after my diagnosis completely freaking out, growing more isolated and angry as each day passed. Author Steven Levine says that most people die an “Oh, shit!” death—one of total shock and terror just before the car crashes or the heart attack turns deadly or the kidneys begin to fail. I was afraid that would be me. I went through the traditional stages of grief: denial and isolation, anger, bargaining, and depression, but couldn’t move past them to the acceptance phase.

Part of the problem was that I had a dark past, marred by a series of traumatic events and tragic mistakes, and my death sentence felt like an apt ending to an unfulfilled life. Desperately ill, I struggled to make the best of my remaining time, but my overwhelming fear and misery overrode my attempts to be happy and robbed me of hope.

Then I had the opportunity to meet with a Tibetan lama for advice. I poured out my tale of woe, expecting the lama to shower sympathy and compassion on my deserving shoulders. Instead, he told me with loving ferocity to stop feeling sorry for myself and start focusing on the happiness of others. I argued that I was too sick to help myself, let alone other people, but the lama insisted. Although I had been a victims’ advocate for years, I had been so focused on my own suffering, that I had become oblivious to the needs of others. So I began as I could, with small acts of kindness, such as saying a prayer when an ambulance passed by and letting people go ahead of me in the checkout line at the grocery store. I bought a tank of gas for a woman whose husband had lost his job so she could get to work the next day. I spent long hours on the phone with a friend who was going through a difficult time. I did everything I could within my limited abilities to think about and act for the happiness of others. I also began to practice an ancient prayer technique called Tonglen (that I teach my clients) that helped me to transform my fears and anger into gratitude and peace, and even decreased the pain I experienced.

Gradually, I noticed that every time I did something nice for someone else, I felt a small rush of happiness. At the physiological level, the “happy endorphins” my body created in response to each act lowered my blood pressure, regulated my breathing, and reduced the stress chemicals that were so deadly to me. I began to notice that I had less pain and more energy.

I graduated to larger acts of generosity—co-signing on a car loan for a young woman so she could secure a job and volunteering at the Red Cross after Hurricane Katrina. I became even happier, and the happier I became, the better I felt, until I reached a state of such emotional healing that it no longer mattered whether I lived or died—I was happy regardless of the obstacles I encountered or how much time I had left. In fact, if someone had offered me one more day to live feeling as I did at this point or ten more years feeling as I did before my diagnosis, I would choose that one precious day. Finally, I had reached the stage of acceptance and I was loving my life, every precious moment of it.

Then the most amazing thing happened; my condition began to reverse itself and today I feel better than I have in 20 years! I still have periods when I am laid low by my illness and I experience some cognitive impairment, but my happiness point is set so high now that I am unfazed by them. I will still die one day, as we all will, but the “when” is less important to me than the “how.” I am determined to die with the words, “I love you” on my lips and with the glow of joy and gratitude on my face.

Reaching such a stage of joyful acceptance is not only possible for you, but even more likely than for a person who is not facing a life-challenging illness. The fact is, your illness can be the gift that sets you free to live a life—and die a death—overflowing with happiness and gratitude.

I can help you accomplish this.

Frequently Asked Questions:

"CJ Scarlet is absolutely brilliant!  She has an uncanny ability to cut through to the most important issues and guide me to solutions that really work!  CJ's enthusiasm, insights, expertise, and style of clear communication make our sessions something I really look forward to - I know my business is being catapulted to a new dimension each and every time. Working with her has changed my life and brought opportunities I never had imagined!  Thank you, CJ!" ~ Debbie Friedman, President and CEO of Cleaning Out The Closet Of Your Mind, Inc.

Why is coaching necessary? More than 10 million people in the U.S. have cancer and millions more face other life-challenging illnesses every day. In fact, one-half of the population will receive the grim news that they have a life-threatening illness at some point. When people receive a scary diagnosis, they come face to face with their mortality. It can be the most horrible experience of their lives or the absolute best thing that ever happened to them--depending on their perspective and attitude. Our normal reaction to the news that we will die sooner than we expected results in fear, anger, depression, and denial—all of which produce additional stress chemicals that further damage our ailing bodies, and feed our fears and illnesses.

Now imagine you have someone on your side to help you put things into perspective and access your own innate wisdom, so you can find the peace and clarity you need to face your illness with courage and grace. I am “America’s Happy Endings Coach,” and I am here to help you come to terms with your illness and live your best life yet in the time you have left. As a certified life transitions coach, I serve those who are grappling with serious illness, as well as their loved ones, to help them find emotional healing and wholeness, and to transform their fears and anger into happiness and acceptance. When I accept you as a client, I become your confidante, your sounding board, your guide, your accountability partner, and your cheerleader, to help you identify and implement your goals. I hold everything you choose to share with me in the strictest confidence and adhere to the highest ethical standards.

“What would I do without you, CJ? Your wisdom and wonderful ability to listen transformed my thinking and helped me work through a difficult problem. You are a terrific coach!” ~ Barbara Brigham

“CJ helped me tremendously by teaching me how to put my perceived problems in perspective.  Her coaching has assisted me in dealing with things I was agonizing about but over which I really had no control.  Thank you so much!” ~ Ruth Gray

I am not a therapist and personal coaching is very different from therapy. Rather than psychoanalyzing you, I will ask you questions that will help reveal what you need to work on and how you want to move forward. In truth, most people don’t need therapy; they simply need an ally, someone who is totally focused on their needs and issues. Think of what you could accomplish if you had a partner who is as dedicated to your emotional well-being as you are! Of course, genuine change, lasting change, begins with you, because you alone have the power to make the choices in your life that lead to happiness and acceptance. Are you ready to invite happiness, joy, gratitude, and forgiveness into your life? You don’t have to suffer alone any longer. Contact me, and together we’ll begin the journey of your lifetime.

What is Personal Coaching?   Personal coaching is a client-centered partnership, based on trust and confidentiality.  Coaching is geared toward high-functioning people who have a strong desire to improve their lives.  Coaches don’t give advice or solve clients’ problems; rather, they help clients identify their issues and goals, and think through their options.  The client is the expert; the coach is a midwife who helps them re-direct their energy and attention to their own personal development.   Do I need a Personal Coach?   When good athletes want to become great athletes, they hire a professional coach.  Actors, singers, and business executives also use professional coaches to help them excel and develop a successful mindset in pursuit of their goals.  Regular people who want to live extraordinary lives can benefit from coaching too.   What types of coaching do you offer?   I offer both individual and group coaching.  Each confidential session lasts approximately 45 minutes, and is based on the client’s agenda.  I also offer weekly telecoaching sessions on specific topics for those who would benefit from sharing their stories and wisdom with others.     Is coaching right for you?   If you are struggling with any of the issues below and need help to re-establish balance, reduce stress, and achieve true happiness in your life, I can help you.  I work with people who are experiencing: A life-challenging illness or condition Trouble dealing with death and dying issues for themselves or others Difficulty integrating physical or mental illness into their lives Difficulty balancing personal and professional needs Challenging family and relationship issues The loss of a cherished relationship The desire to improve their lives and find genuine peace and happiness

“CJ pointed me towards career possibilities that hadn't occurred to me, but which show every indication of being very fruitful for me.  I truly appreciate your help.” ~ Jull Mullin

The coaching commitment: Personal coaching requires a real commitment from you to stick with it until you achieve your goals.  Sessions are conducted over the telephone or via Instant Messaging, which save both time and money.  All fees are to be paid on a weekly or monthly basis, prior to services being provided.  (These fees may be tax-deductible; check with your tax professional.)  I accept all major credit cards through PayPal, and use VeriSign to ensure your personal information is protected.  I will never sell or rent your information to anyone.

Call or email me now to set up a free, no obligation 15-minute consultation to determine if personal coaching is right for you.  I can be reached at info@cjscarlet.com or by phone at 800-611-3161.  International clients may call me at (01) 919-763-9231.  Please be mindful that I reside in the Eastern Standard Time Zone, and that my hours of operation are 10 a.m. to 5 p.m. Monday through Friday, unless we arrange an appointment outside of those hours.

 

Is coaching worth the cost?

 

Professional life transitions coaching is the best investment you’ll ever make because it is an investment in yourself.  When you are overwhelmed by personal difficulties, every area of your life is affected—emotional, mental, physical, professional, and spiritual.  Just as you can’t reach your destination without a good map, your life can’t properly function when your energy and attention are not focused in the right direction.

 

The cost of coaching is insignificant compared to the price you pay for the physical and emotional stress on your body and mind, not to mention the impact on your personal efforts and relationships.  Isn’t it worth the price to find the peace, clarity, and happiness you deserve as you work through the most challenging period of your life?